Getting A Head In Puppetry.

Dear Scallywagistas.

Having been dabbling in smaller scale puppets for a bit, (see pic on the right) I am back to large scale, moving mouth foam rubber with the gentleman pictured below. He as yet has no defined name or character (or indeed body) but many ideas, and of course potential. I think there may be a "Meet the director" thing after the STAN show in Croydonites, and I plan to bring him down there to illustrate how my puppets have evolved over the years (STAN was my first puppet).  Tickets are still available so hurry! I posted a pic of him on Facebook today, and so far comments have been that he looks angry, unhappy and mean. (Perhaps they were talking about me?) I think he's more enigmatic and pensive. (Perhaps I'm talking about me?) But foam rubber is in the eye of the beholder and all that. Probably.

Hokey pokey, onwards and upwards. Or sideways.

STAN's Nürnberger Trial.

Dear Scallynaggers,

Just in case you covert continued compulsion and coercion to come to Croydon, here's an excellent review from the local newspaper we got for a show in Nurnberg as part of the amazing

Figurentheater Festival Erlangen

probably the best (and certainly the biggest) puppet festival in the German speaking world, translated by my ex, proving she wasn't completely useless. What d'you mean, bitter?

Tickets availa-bubble here - get 'em while they're hot. 

STAN review - Nürnberger Zeitung,

The one-man-show "STAN" again proves that the best humor is not just slapstick but has discreet depth. At first sight STAN is the archetype of a chauvinist: sexist to the threshold of pain, testosterone driven and in an absolute yet inadequate manner sure of himself. But behind this facade lies a sensitive inner life. That this identity crises is so fascinating can alone be accredited to Jim Barnard's accomplished performance and his remarkable physical skill. He is a puppeteer with both feet and one hand in his Alter Ego.

And here's an excellent flyer designed by the Incorrigible Graphics Maestra Jona Borrut for a show we did up in Norway.

Now´s the time to post a rhyme.

Dear Scallywaggers, small and great,
A week today will be the date,
And curtain up will be at 8,
For STAN to get in motion,

That´s why I felt today was right,
To tell you of that splendid night,
Once more to ram home, if I might,
More Shameless Self Promotion.

So come to Croydon, if you dare,
Put on a frock and do your hair,
For Croydonites first night is there,
And folks will be excited.

So get your tickets in advance,
Next Thursday is your only chance,
I´ll be so thrilled I´ll sing and dance.
And STAN will be delighted.

To Boldly Go Where No STAN Has Gone Before...

Dearest Scallywaggers, Scallyblaggers and Scallyshaggers,

It may be only 57 shopping days until Christmas, but this year Santa is coming early in the form of everybody´s favourite lovable rogue, the original Scallywag, STAN. As STAN himself might say - Ho Ho MuthaFrackin Ho.

After extensive research, my Marketing and Promotions Team have determined that two weeks before the show is the optimal time to compel you all to stick this date into your agendas, plenty of lube.

The date to remember is the 12th of November.

Here´s the link to STAN´s Croydonites webpage.

As many of you will know, STAN has delighted and excited audiences from Bavaria to Belarus to Barcelona, from Norway to Slovenia to Cabo Verde and beyond. But perhaps the high point in STAN´s short yet glittering life was in La Paz, Bolivia. Not high because of the 3000 meters altitude or extremely potent Bolivian Marching Powder, but rather the two sold out nights there of rapturous reception in South America´s oldest Opera House, where for the first time in that beautiful theatre´s 150 year history, we stripped the stage naked of all wings, flats and sets. And said "cock" a lot.

But on the 12th of November STAN looks set to top even those giddy heights, as we open the first ever New Theatre Festival in the legendary land of opportunity and adventure, otherwise known as Croydon. Contrary to popular misconception, Croydon is actually very easy and quick to get to - only 15 minutes on a train from Victoria. And London Bridge. Probably.

Mad props to Anna Arthur, Princess Croydon herself and both the brains and brawn behind this daring missionary mission, to bravely go where no culture has gone before. (Although we all know that David Bowie AND Kate Bush went to Art College there, right? Right? Get in.)

We perform one night only in The Utopia Theatre at Mathews Yard in the historic heart of Croydon´s Olde Town. As it´s an intimate theatre with limited seating, I would urge you to book early to avoid disappointment. (Yes, that is another embedded link in the word "book" taking you directly to the Ticket Source booking site.)

We´re very excited about STAN´s UK Premier, and looking forward to seeing friends old and new down in Croydon.

See y´all in Utopia.

Return Of The Prodigal Scum - Back To Blighty. Or Sumfink.

High Scallyblaggers.

HIGH TIME indeed for a Scallywag Update. After being away for more than two decades, London has welcomed me back like an old but very expensive whore. She is not shy or fussy, she has definitely seen better days, is probably a little too proud of her costly but vulgar new tit-job, and is the kind of women that orders a "double anything with anything" in a bar.

Speaking of over-priced drinks, massive shout out to Konzert Theater Bern in that 3D picture postcard called Switzerland. I was invited there two weeks ago to record the voice over for their new Frankenstein production and once again had a fantastic time. Special shout out to Winston for being such a perfect host. Premier is on April 23rd, so do yourself a flavor and get down there. http://www.konzerttheaterbern.ch/tanz/uebersicht/veranstaltung/-87a3e29be2/?month=201504&date=1429567200

And thus hence and forthwith back to Blighty, anon. And to the ongoing project with the quite fabulous Dog Kennel Hill Project. http://www.dogkennelhillproject.org/#!argument/c1amq
Rehearsals for their (our, Godammit!) new production is well underway, and comes to premier at The Yard Theatre in Hackney Wick from April 27th - 30th. (Yeah, I did embed that link, I'm not fucking around here.)

There will be a tour in November to places in the UK that I have never been to, and quite frankly, doubt they actually exist. Like Warwick. And Scotland.

More updates and reminders to follow, but for now thats yer lot.