Scallywag Radio Presents - Fast And Spurious

Hola Scallywagistas.

"What? Another one, already!?" I hear your imaginary voices ring out across the World Wide Cybernet, "But what new news can Team Scallywag possibly have to share so soon after the last blog posting?"

Well, dear imaginary reader, Scallywag Productions is thrilled to announce the re-launch of one of our most exciting departments, Scallywag Radio. And better still, rather than reporting on work that we've done, or giving notice of upcoming Scallywag events, today's BlogSpotPost is a platform to present ACTUAL CONTENT. Dis shit for real, you feelin' me fam?

As the more observant of you will have noticed, that in a break with tradition I have stuck the content at the top rather than the bottom of this post. This is to give you direct and easy access, so that you don't have to scroll down past the turgid and barely coherent text. In this case, to quite literally cut-to-the-car-chase.

The re-launch of Scallywag Radio also represents a small but significant shift of focus and intent. Due to a shit-storm of circumstances that I won't bore you with, Scallywag Productions is currently in the hiatus of a self-imposed exile in a rural backwater of the Iberian Peninsula. (This is neither as good nor bad as it sounds. Or it is as good and as bad as it sounds.) As an artist, I need two things - the opportunity to make work, and the opportunity to present that work. The opportunities to make and present theatre down here are at best limited, and at worst non-existent. In the words of the Buddha (probably) "Focus on what you do have, rather than what you don't have." What I do have down here is the opportunity to create audio content, and to present it on the Interweb. "Fast And Spurious" is the first in a planned series of Micro Audio Plays. The follow up "Like That" is already in production.

So, dear imaginary reader, a few words about "Fast And Spurious" for those of you who are interested. As you may have guessed, the inspiration for this Micro Audio Play is of course the insanely successful movie franchise Fast and the Furious (almost 4 billion dollars of box office over it's 16 years and 7 moves). The content of these movies is so breathtakingly simplistic, that I felt I could reveal the essence of all 7 films in 2 and a half minutes of audio. (I've only actually seen two of the films, but am pretty sure the other five are exactly the same.)

Action movies aren't typically known for their depth and thought-provoking content, yet I believe Fast and the Furious has taken this genre to it's absolute, steroid-pumped, mindless limit. I saw one of them (6, possibly?) on telly the other week, and was struck and slightly disturbed by one element in particular. Now, the format is basically a series of action sequences glued together with a rizla-thin plot - which could actually be written down on one rizla. These action sequences are spectacular, monstrously kinetic, and certainly largely responsible for the success of this franchise.

It was however the "character" element which I found somewhat disturbing. For those of you not familiar with the F&F franchise, the action centers around a group of hard-nuts (male and female) who are mavericks that operate outside of the law, have some noble and important mission to accomplish, and because of the moral high-ground imparted by this mission, can do whatever the fuck they want with total impunity. And they drive fast cars. Really fast. Each member of the group is pretty much the same character, only distinguished by barely two-dimensional cartoon personas. The black guy is "funny", the beefcake is "serious", the chiseled jaw-line GQish former-cop character is "brooding", the Hispanic woman is "feisty" and the Asian guy is, erm, just Asian, really. But that didn't disturb me.

This did. The "narrative" as such, is a series of problems or obstacles that need to be solved or overcome to achieve their final goal. In every single case, without exception, these problems or obstacles are solved with either violence or the threat of violence. These characters are the good guys. The heros. They're cool and good looking. They have seemingly limitless financial resources. They are driven (no pun intended) to do the "right thing" and are willing to take ridiculous risks to achieve this. As an audience we are supposed to aspire to be like them. To be them. And the way they deal with every problem they encounter is violence.

As I was watching the movie and noticing this, I started to wonder if violence was the way our heros were really going to deal with every situation. Then a scene started which looked like it was going to deliver something else. Four of the group - two guys two girls - are visiting a scrap yard, because the guy who works there has some information they need. The two guys start readying themselves to go down and beat the crap out of him, but then the two girls step in. "Hey", one of them says "sometimes you need a feminine touch..." followed by a coquettish toss of her hair they then wiggle off towards the scrap-yard guy, everyone exchanging sly grins and knowing glances. The two girls start questioning the scrap-yard guy, using their feminine charms. But he won't tell them anything. So they beat the living crap out of him.

Now, violence is part of the human condition, and has an important part to play in drama - indeed, for as long as there has been drama there has been violence in drama. Even the direct ancestor of this genre movie, James Bond, was at times very violent. But for Bond, violence wasn't the default way of handling every situation, and was most often the last resort. Bond would usually rely on his ingenuity, wit, guile and often charm to solve problems.

I'm not squeamish about violence, and am not for a moment suggesting that movies shouldn't have violent content. Violence is a dark side of human nature, and as such a powerful component of drama. What disturbed me was to see violence not merely condoned, but unashamedly celebrated. The message of these movies is very clear - violence is the best way to deal with all your problems, and anyone who is physically superior or has the biggest gun, has the absolute right to use force to achieve their goals. As a message to the young and impressionable, this is a little worrying.

However, if these movies do have any depth, then it is the geo-political message behind the vapid spectacle - specifically, this is a justification and celebration of American foreign policy. The guy with the biggest gun and the most violent disposition has the right to appoint himself Sheriff, and bully or kill whoever the fuck he wants to.

God bless America.

For those of you who didn't listen to Fast And Spurious at the top of the page, or who want to hear all 2 minutes and 34 seconds again and can't be bothered to scroll back up, here it is once more. With a slightly different graphic.

Watch this space - even "follow" this blog! - for the upcoming Micro Audio Play "Like That".

As always, please do post your comments right here, below in the "comments" section.